1 Year
I'll miss you for the rest of my life
October 3, 2024 at 6:50PM was your last earthly breath and you breathed your way into a promised eternity. My heart is still missing a piece and there is not a day that goes by that I don’t think of you. I especially think of you when I am in my kitchen cooking because so many of my childhood memories revolve around helping you in the kitchen. Some days it’s hard to even cook or bake because the grief can get overwhelming at times.
Before you passed, I read Bible verses to you, sang my favorite hymns to you and read you my speech that I have planned to read at your funeral with the hopes that you could hear me. I wanted you to hear it and I remember saying to you that I hoped you liked it. I’m so thankful you didn’t suffer or linger in hospice care. You went peacefully and I am grateful to have been there to witness your last moments with Daddy & my sister. I felt honored to help hospice take care of you before they took your body away. It was a moment I will never forget and I know that’s what you would have wanted, to have your girls there with you.
I thought it would be the right moment now to share what I got up and read at Mom’s funeral service.
Vickie Cotney, wife, mom, and MamaC, was born on March 4, 1951.
Mom never liked to celebrate her birthday.. She even went as far as making sure it was never in the church bulletin and wouldn’t allow us to ever put anything on social media. Lori & I started calling it “Oh Happy Day” and would send her a text, note or flowers that just said, “I hope you have a happy day”.
Mom would be so thrilled to see all of you here today…especially those dressed in her favorite color…leopard print. Mom was famous throughout the church for her wonderful, delicious chocolate chip cookies. So many of you have shared memories of mom and many of those memories revolved around those cookies. She would want each of you to take home her recipe, which we have provided for each of you in the foyer and make them for your families. I make them each time we have a repair worker over to the house and the final bill always comes down…coincidence, I think not.
Mom grew up in Childersburg, Alabama, attended Childersburg Church of Christ, where one night at a youth event, a young, handsome, 8th grade boy (my daddy) took notice and had to know who this beautiful girl was. He commented to another boy standing next to him that he was going to marry that girl one day…that other boy happened to be her big brother…oops! Dad chased her for a few years before she finally agreed to go on a homecoming date with him after his football game. He was so excited for that date that he played the game so hard and ended up in the hospital with a concussion. Mom went to see him of course and somehow Dad won her heart. No one thought the two of them would ever last! They married in 1970 and… this year (2024) on August 14 they celebrated 54 years of marriage. What a testimony of faithful love. And they have mentored so many other couples over that 54 years.
In December 1973, they welcomed their first daughter, Lori. She was and is so sweet, helpful and calm….And then in April 1978 they welcomed their second daughter…me! Let’s just say that if they would have had me first they wouldn’t have had any more…I’m not sure why…I really wasn’t that bad! Mom heard from day one of my birth that I looked nothing like her, people asked her if I was adopted…but once they saw my Daddy, they knew who I look and act like. There are so many things that I do get from mom. I love to bake and cook, read, craft, collect pictures, and scrapbook.
Some of my favorite memories with mom were helping her bake and cook, especially cookies, fudge and so many wonderful meals. I developed a love of cooking by watching her.
Another favorite memory as a child with Mom was her always picking us up from school and waiting at home for us was a snack where we talked about our day with her. She always wanted to know how our day had gone. She was the best craft maker for school projects and sewed a lot of our clothes.
Also…I have to talk about the hair. I met many a guy after I would overhear them asking who was the lady with all the hair? “Oh, that’s my mom”, I’d say. Her hair was iconic…she even said once that her hair was the reason stadium seating was invented at the movie theaters. She was a beautiful lady.
Mom couldn’t wait for those grandkids to come. Parker, born in 1996 to Lori & Sid was the only grandchild for 11 years and then the others started rolling in. Isabelle & Phoenix were born in 2007, Brady came in 2008 and Fox in 2010. Mom always referred to the 4 of them as the “Fantastic Four” then 2 spunky and sweet girls arrived, Brooklyn in 2014 and Lilly in 2015. Nothing made Mom prouder than showing off her grandkids. I’m sure each of you here have been shown a picture or two or 100 of us or those grandkids. She loved it when we were all together at church!
Mom loved her church family. Loved you all so much. Every week when we talked on the phone she would tell me about another new family that she had gotten to know. It was her happy place. She adored all the children and they loved MamaC and the smarties she always handed out. Please make sure that you get some for your children, they are provided in the foyer. She drew her strength from your kind words, wonderful sermons and beautiful hymns.
Some verses that bring comfort to me is Isaiah 43:1-3
“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you;
I have called you by your name; you are mine.
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you,
And the rivers will not overwhelm you,
When you walk through the fire,
You will not be scorched,
And the flames will not burn you.
For I am the Lord your God,
The Holy One of Israel, and your Savior”.Even on this day we can still be thankful to God who has given us victory in Jesus. Mom’s Happy Day wasn’t March 4, 1951, her happy day was October 3, 2024 when she finally got to meet her Lord and Savior face to face.
Missing you is something that I will never get over. I cannot walk this earth and not notice that it is entirely empty.
I love you Mom.
~Wendy~